Running Low

At the moment I feel like I’m running low on inspiration and motivation. Its like a sort of lethargy has entered my bones and keeps dragging my attention away from the important things that I need to do and sort out. I love the internet and being immersed in all those communities out there, but sometimes it distracts me too much away from what I’m meant to be focusing on. In other words, I’m procrastinating, mostly because I’m just not feeling very inspired. I’ve got two assignments to do for May and then June, and I have a newsletter to edit. I told myself that I would start looking at local newspapers and magazines to see if I can review for them. Instead I have found myself stuck in a bit of a rut. I’m not sure why, because I have plenty of opportunities to work and get myself writing, but I think it’s been all too easy to get sucked into Twitter, reading blogs and perusing websites.

It’s not that I’m discouraged from following my writerly dreams; more that I feel that I need a kick up the backside and my routine needs to be changed. I start something then it gets stalled for some reason or another. Maybe all I need is a change of scenery – to encourage myself to go for walks more often, to get out there and have contact with the living, breathing world. It is my own fault for allowing this heavy lethargy to set in, and not pulling myself out of it sooner. My family are facing a few problems of their own at the moment, so the atmosphere here is a bit low and we are all sad for each other. My manfriend is stressed out with his dissertation and my sister and I are both stressing about what to do for our next two assignments. I have an idea of where I want to go so its more a case of getting down to it and writing.

My environment is bugging me – there are piles of washing we have to do, a messy work surface and a room that could do with a spring clean. I actually managed to put all my clothes in the wardrobe where they belong, but there are still things here and there that need major sorting out. For a start, there are bags of paperwork that I have to sort and shred, so I’m hoping I can get a start on that tomorrow. See – another reason to put off all my writing! Its so easy to find other things that need doing. I kind of feel like my cluttered environment is stopping me from working well – a cluttered mind.

What stops me completely melting down is the knowledge that I will actually get round to doing everything on my ‘to-do’ list. Perhaps I should be kinder with myself and set little goals rather than going full force into something. Easy little baby steps is what I need right now – to slowly put my life back on track and get myself out of this stagnant lethargic trap.

I’ve made a resolution with myself to re-work the stuff I already have and restyle things in my wardrobe because I just can’t afford to buy stuff at the moment. I’ve had a fun few months buying certain things that I have impulsively fallen in love with, but its time to sit back and try to ignore the tide of fashion and to get back into my own style. I know I have my own thing going on, but sometimes it feels as though fashion takes over. So I will be focusing on remixing and reworking for outfit posts on my fatshion blog here in the coming months.

I stumbled on a really cool website where you can make your own outfit combinations and put them into collages – it’s called Polyvore and my profile is here. It is kind of addictive but its inspired me to take photos of all the stuff I have in my wardrobe so I can sort of mix and match things up 🙂

2 thoughts on “Running Low

  1. I recognise that lethargic feeling- I sense it overtaking me as I write this, following what’s been a few pretty active & productive weeks. I think it’s best to just go with it & acknowledge that you will come out of it eventually. You mention walking – I always find a walk can centre me and give me some perspective to get me going again, so I definitely recommend it. And I know about how cluttered space can contribute to a cluttered mind- I can’t relax and write unless my flat is clean and tidy.

    I hope you’re feeling more yourself soon… you still managed to put a blog post together so that’s something! No one can be productive and on top of things all the time. I’m sure when you get your energy back you’ll be firing on all cylinders! xx

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  2. Hi Michelle,

    Thanks for your comment – it made me feel better! I’ve managed to do the newsletter and send it off to be proofread, now I’m contemplating my next OU assignment. I might be writing a story about wiccanism/magic realism!

    Anyway, the lethargy seems to be slowly letting me out of its grip and I’m feeling slightly more motivated. I think once you actually get down to something, you wonder why you were feeling so reluctant about it. My room is still an absolute tip but I’m going to tackle that tomorrow. I managed to sort most of those bags of paperwork out, so all that I need to do now is the cleaning and tidying! 🙂

    I hope you’re feeling a little bit better too 🙂 xx

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