Sometimes you might find that things rush up so quickly that you’re not sure how to cope with it. You might have to make decisions that fill you with dread, even when you know they’re right. When you make that decision, you find yourself seeing more clearly, noticing the things that you didn’t notice before. About two and a half years ago, we had to make the decision to say goodbye to Quentin, one of our cats, because he was going through heart-failure. It was the first time I think any of us had had to make such a heartbreaking decision. It was the right thing to do, even though I lost a dear friend and companion that day.
A year later, in November 2011, we had to make the same decision for Georgina, Quentin’s sister. I don’t think anyone can put into words just how hard it is to let go, even though you’re brave and you’re respecting them and their quality of life. After Georgie died, we had Flossie left with us, Georgie’s surprise baby – our Mum had said that we could keep one of the litter if there was a black and white cat. All of the litter were tortoiseshell – all except one, Flossie with her black and white longhaired coat, and a very cute, distinctive smudge on one side of her nose.
Over the years, Flossie has entertained us with her mad half hours in which she has zoomed from one room to another, racing up the stairs and down again and behaving like an overgrown kitten. When Georgie left us, we had about half a year before Flossie starting exhibiting signs of hyperthyroidism – losing weight and muscle mass, demanding more food, being more anxious and fidgety. Just like her Mum – sometimes it runs in cat genes.
So we took her to the vet and he gave us some tablets to try, but after a little while she started having a severe reaction to them, bringing them up with blood. So we decided to stop them and give her the best quality of life in her twilight years that we could. We knew at some point she would go downhill, and this is the point where she is. Tomorrow we’re taking her to the vet and saying goodbye, and as much as it always breaks my heart, I know we’re doing the right thing for her. She’s becoming unhappy right now, after yesterday where she was happy, I can see she’s uncomfortable and I don’t want that for her. Like my sister says, when you have pets, you know that you’ll have to say goodbye one day. You carry the love and memories with you, the happy times and the not so happy times – and eventually one day you will look back without this sharp pain of loss and smile because it was all beautiful.
Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them. ~ Marcus Aurelius, Meditations.